Indecisiveness: What Causes It & 10 Methods to Help You Make Decisions: Part 2
In the last blog post, we discussed indecisiveness and how it can limit and sometimes, stop us from moving forward with the life we’re meant to live.
If you feel or know that you have challenges with decision-making, ie: lack of confidence, second-guessing yourself, ignoring your intuition, perfectionism, ADHD, PTSD, trauma………and more, then it’s time to get better at the skill set (which you can learn and practice) of decision-making.
If you need help with improving your self-confidence, decreasing your perfectionist tendencies, working through and healing trauma, etc., then please be in touch or ask for professional help.
Here are 10 Methods that can help you become more decisive: (PsychCentral):
1)Make decisions for yourself (your own decisions):
This is an important one. When we’re feeling indecisive, we’ll often reach out to someone, ie: friend, partner, family member, to get their input. The problem with this is that YOUR decision will be based on their input, in other words, them (not you). When you ask others, you ultimately get even more confused.
The thing is to learn to listen and to hear your own intuition! Who else can really give you the correct answers on what’s best for you……….besides you?
2)Develop self-confidence:
Let’s say you’ve listened to your intuition and made a decision or choice. The next and vital step is then, to have the confidence to trust your intuition. You can learn and practice this over time. Once you develop this confidence in yourself and your decision-making abilities, you’ll find it easier to make and stick to decisions.
3)Let it go…..
The fear that comes with worrying about making the ‘wrong’ decision, can feel overwhelming and paralyzing.
Once you understand that ‘mistakes’ are a part of life (and needed for learning lessons), and that things are not always in your control, decision-making will become easier and much less threatening.
4)Narrow it Down:
Often in this present-day world, filled with lots and lots and lots of choices………a vast variety of options, you’ve got to take a practical, even surgical approach to making decisions.
Let’s say you have 10 options. First, narrow down your selections to 3 options, mostly by listening to your ‘body’ (intuitive hits) and just slice out the other 7. Don’t question yourself.
Then, do the same ‘body listening’ for these last 3 and pick the one that resonates with you (even if it’s not the most logical or practical choice).
Remember, there’s no ‘right’ or ‘wrong. Just pick one and see what it brings you and where it leads you……
5)Outline the Pros and Cons:
Go the old-fashioned way and write out a simple pro/con list. You must WRITE it down! Get it out of your head; continuous mental weighing of the pros and cons simply adds to the indecisiveness.
6)Choose someone who can act as a sounding board:
There are times when you’re really stuck, stumped, arggghh…..
Ask a supportive friend or partner…….to listen, encourage and sometimes, weigh in.
7)Talk it Out:
When we voice our fears and choices.. and speak them out loud, it helps get rid of our indecision and internal conflict.
You can try voicing what you think out loud to a supportive, non-judgmental friend or partner, and, in this way, your decisions are less confusing and worrisome. Try it!
8)Flip a Coin:
Clearly, this method is not to be used for major life decisions, like marriage, but for something simple, it works.
The truth is that if you flip a coin and it lands the ‘wrong’ way, your reaction will reveal what you truly want.
9)Do not question your final decision:
You’ve made the decision. Now, avoid second-guessing yourself. Simply embrace your selection or choice and move forward and onward.
10)Be Aware of and Celebrate your Decisions:
As I often suggest to my clients, ‘pat yourself on the back.’
Congratulate yourself for EVERY decision you make, big or small……
You can say and practice a kind affirmation (positive and in the present tense), like, ‘I made a great decision and I’m getting better and better at making choices. Yahoo; this feels really good!’
Your inner critic (negative voice) may come creeping in to try to create self-doubt. If so, just repeat your kind and validating affirmation…………over and over and over again……..
Remember, there are steps you can take to get better at making decisions. It’s a fabulous and necessary skill that you can learn.
Practice, practice, practice!
If you feel that indecisiveness is affecting your daily life and functioning, please consider talking with a professional (ie: therapist, coach, physician, etc.).
As Maimonides said: “The risk of a wrong decision is preferable to the terror of indecision.”
With smiles and love,
Dr Gigi
PS: If you find that indecisiveness is adversely affecting your daily life, please feel free to contact me@www.gigiarnaud.com or at the social media sites below.
Change your Thoughts, Change your Mind, Change your World