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Every year, many of us make resolutions and after a few days, weeks or months, we seem to forget about them…So, let’s talk about ways you can kick-start this new year 2022 for a year of success for you, personally and professionally, even if you’re living with anxiety. As a life coach (NYC) and mindset coach, I’d like to discuss 10 ways to move forward for 2022 and then, next week, we’ll continue with more ideas and ways you can kick-start your new year for success, self-empowerment and joy!

It’s holiday time!

It can be a joyous time for many and it’s important to revel in the moments of joy we experience. The holiday season can also be triggering for those of us who have anxiety of any kind.

You can really enjoy yourself and also ready yourself and prepare. So, let’s talk about how……….

If you’re trying to get rid of something, ie: anxiety, then you’re not accepting it. And accepting it is important to be able to accept yourself because it’s a part of you. When you fight with and reject your anxiety, you are, in essence, attacking and rejecting yourself. Guess what? This only creates more anxiety, so it’s defeating its purpose.

You’ve now developed AWARENESS of when your anxiety comes up, along with your Chronic Stress Response (CSR) or survival response, and where the anxiety originates from: is it amygdala-based or cortex-based? (refer to blog post: How to Live Well with Anxiety: part 4). Now, it’s time to start taking steps to change your CSR and alleviate your anxiety symptoms, in body, mind and spirit. Here are some of the tools……….

There are basically 4 ANS survival responses: Fight, Flight, Freeze or Fawn.

In the fight or flight response, you react to a stimulus that scares you. Your heart rate, blood pressure and extremity muscle strength increase and you either stay and fight or get out of there (flight), depending on which choice will allow you to survive. People who often have this survival response can feel often anxious, rushing and even, hypervigilant (because of the fear that danger may be lurking around the corner). So, their nervous system often become dysregulated.

In the freeze response, you stay frozen, in place, in order to survive. People who have this freeze response may tend to feel depressed.

In the fawn response, you bend to other people’s wants and needs; you people-please. This can become your response with serious emotional abuse and, clearly, has negative ramifications for your adult life.

You may recognize one or more of these responses within you. Sometimes, there is one prevailing response and sometimes, a mix. We all respond differently to stress and these may become chronic responses to stress.

The good news: You can do something to change this negative feedback loop.

.I know anxiety spirals personally, having had anxiety with me for most of my life, where I got trapped in negative thought patterns, which created awful downward spirals that were just about impossible to escape.

I often looked for distractions and you may be doing the same: ie: overeating, too much social media, over-binging on Netflix, Prime and the like (particularly during Covid, which has increased anxiety levels in our society), or just sitting and worrying about events that may or may not happen and that may not even be a part of reality.

I finally learned that there are ways to change these scenes and spirals. If your life is a movie and you’re the star, then you have to find ways to take charge of your big, leading role. Here’s some of what I learned……..

Learn where in the brain your anxiety is coming from. Is it amygdala-based or cortex-based? You’ll find the TIPS for treating each type. It’s important to know the difference!

Time for some SELF-EXPLORATION:

-you may first want to take some deep breaths, placing one hand on your belly, feeling it expand as you inhale and exhale, and the other hand on your chest (or over your heart). Certain breathing techniques can help reduce your anxiety, so that you can think more clearly and can introspect.

-grab a journal or notebook and write down thoughts, ideas and hunches that come up, using these prompts or ideas (writing on paper works better here):

Anxiety affects all of us but some of us, more often and more intensely, than others. The good news: these days, there’s so much you can do about it. Important to know: you don’t have to do it alone. Reach out to others; reach out for help and know that you’re not alone! Many of us have or still do suffer and struggle with anxiety (me included); it doesn’t mean that you can’t live a happy, healthy and successful life………..

Anxiety isn’t stress; it’s your mind and body’s reaction to stressful, dangerous or unfamiliar situations. It usually manifests itself as an excessive, intense, persistent worry and fear. Of course, a certain level of anxiety is normal, ie: public speaking. Anxiety (and trauma) get stored in the body, as ie: a hyperactive nervous system, or becoming nervous and fearful in a situation that’s not really dangerous.

Everyone is born with both of these universal energies (feminine and masculine); each person in different doses. They don’t have a gender assigned to them, inherently, but it seems that humankind associated Yin with the feminine and Yang with the masculine. There’s no good or bad when it relates to the amount of each. Both of these energies make up the essence of WHO you are.

BOUNDARIES are essential for healthy relationships and for sound and healthy living. For self-care, healthy boundaries are necessary. And, as humans, we all need self-care and self-love. Without boundaries, we can feel intruded upon, depleted, even taken for granted or taken advantage of…….

It’s important to discover and create your larger, overarching view of what you really want your life and lifestyle to be (your intentions). In other words, it’s vital to create YOUR own version of success, both personally and professionally. You must define what SUCCESS means, is and looks like, for YOU! To figure this out, it’s a good idea to understand:

1)WHO you truly, authentically are

2)WHY you’re here: your purpose, passions and priorities and

3)WHAT you were born to be and meant to do here.

As mentioned in the last blog post, these are the stages of the hypnosis SESSION:

-Pre-induction or Mindset (not always considered a separate stage)

1)Induction

2)Deepening (the TRANCE); use of post-hypnotic suggestions

3)Coming up (out of the trance state)

Recently, I have been asked frequently about hypnosis. “How does hypnosis work?” “What can it help me with?” “I’m not the type to lose control; can I still be hypnotized?” Yes, is the answer to this last question.

It’s time to respond to these inquiries. Before that, let’s talk about what hypnosis isn’t and clear up some of the common myths about it.

To summarize: people-pleasing is a big waste of your time and energy, time and energy that you could be using to discover the authentic you and why you’re here (purpose, passions) and what your unique definition or version of success is…………………and start living it. No matter what you do, there will be those who like you and those who don’t. As my French parents used to say, “C’est la vie----that’s life!”

So, take a pause and give yourself the gift to:

1)relax and rest

2)refresh and rejuvenate

3)recharge and

4)reevaluate.

and then, friends, it’s time and you’re ready to take action!

Why PAUSE?

1)Relax and Rest

2)Refresh and Rejuvenate

3)Recharge

4)Reevaluate

Then, my friends, you’re ready to take action……