How to Cope with the Holidays…..?
We’re, once again, being surrounded with supposed ‘holiday cheer,’ but is it real, for you? This is the question to answer for yourself.
The truth is that many of us feel bombarded, overwhelmed and even, sad, during this holiday season, which seems to be starting earlier and earlier. This year, a reason may be inflation and hard economic times and this is understandable since many businesses make the majority of their money during this holiday season.
So, like many experiences we humans have, some people feel joy and celebration during this time, while others may feel sad and lonely and yet others may feel both. It’s helpful to understand what you’re feeling, understand why and feel compassion for others……… and for yourself.
It could be that you’re dealing with loss, heartbreak, challenging and difficult family dynamics or spending the holidays alone, which can be a harsh reminder of what you’re missing (especially since most holiday commercials are repeating again and again and again…). It can also be hard if many around you are ‘cheery’ and you’re not necessarily feeling this way .
Most important to know and really feel is that YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
For many people, the holiday blues can start as early as the beginning of November. This may also coincide with the change of seasons, the change of the clocks and it getting darker earlier and earlier. Personally, this alone (change to winter, cold and earlier darkness) gets me down.
For some, there’s also the pressure of buying gifts. While this may be helpful to our country’s economy, it can be stressful for individuals, particularly with the Covid pandemic, change and loss of jobs and the presently, high prices. The good thing is that sales are present all over the place, so it’s a good time to buy.
Try to remember the meaning of the holidays to you; it’s not necessary to put pressure on yourself or to buy extravagant gifts or even to buy any. Your choice……….
You CAN still enjoy the holiday season. Let’s discuss some COPING STRATEGIES:
1)No comparing yourself to others. It may be that others have big families or more money to spend on presents….or whatever.
It is said that comparison is poison to your soul and it’s the thief of joy………….both true. No two of us are the same, inside and out.
In the end, we don’t really know how another’s life really is; we don’t live with them behind their doors, we don’t know their traumas or what they’ve been through. Most folks don’t let you in on the tough stuff.
-So, remember that you don’t know everything, about someone else and their life, not even the real amount of money they have.
-stay off social media for a few days. We all know that people show their best parts online…..
2)Plan something to look forward to.
This plan can be during the holidays or after. I like planning travel right after the holidays; less crowds, less expensive, getting away from the cold (I live in NYC) and the anticipation of getting away and travel, which I love.
If you can’t travel, you can go visit a friend nearby or take a course you’ve wanted to take…….and meet new people, too. Win-win!
3)Do it YOUR way.
You can start your own tradition; inviting others over or taking the day to do what YOU love. You can paint, read a book you’ve been meaning to get to, start a book club, have a movie marathon or a pot-luck meal……
4)Do for others; Give back.
Giving boosts your mental, emotional and physical health. There are many ways to volunteer during the holidays.
-Volunteering at a soup kitchen.
-giving a full holiday dinner to a family in need.
-donating clothing, food, your time and attention.
Giving and doing for others also helps you to realize and really understand that we’re all interconnected and are not alone. It also puts things and thoughts into perspective.
5)Create and set boundaries.
This can be for others but I’m talking here about managing your own boundaries.
-Stay away from social media.
-identify your own needs and anticipate your own triggers and create a plan to have boundaries around these to protect your peace.
-Let others know your boundaries; ie: what you don’t want to discuss, etc.
6)Allow yourself to be real and to feel your feelings!
You may feel sadness, missing loved ones, memories of past holidays, overcoming a tough year (or two, which we’ve all had), or just stressed by the pressure of holidays and feeling that we ‘should’ feel joyous.
If you’re not, you’re not. Accept it, feel it, let it wash over you, then, you can let it go.
We are humans, not robots and we are each unique. This is what makes the world and you….beautiful!
Despite what commercials and greeting cards tell you, it’s perfectly fine to feel sad or lonely during the holidays. It’s important to know that these feelings won’t last forever.
Feelings are temporary. This too shall soon pass…….
7)Get support.
If you’re feeling very sad, lonely, depressed, it’s helpful to see or talk to a therapist, counselor, coach or other mental health professional. It not only helps; it can help change your life, for the better.
It’s okay (even a really good thing) to not be like everyone else….and the truth is everyone else is not the same, either. We are all different, unique and beautiful, as we are.
Wishing you peace, joy and love (including self-love) for the holiday season!
With smiles and love,
Dr Gigi
PS: If you’re wanting/needing support or are ready to Change your thoughts and mind to Change your life, then contact me @www.gigiarnaud.com for Life & Mindset Coaching, Hypnosis packages or both……
Or @drgigiarnaud at the social media links below.
Change your Thoughts, Change your Mind, Change your World